disturbed.


I just read a recent post of my friend. I understand how she feels, as I felt the same way. Not entirely the same, but almost. Somethings are just hard to forget, but somehow, certain people expects you to forget it fast, without considering how we feel; how our heart feels. It was insensitive alright, but we couldn’t blame them if they’re not sensitive towards how we feel. Not everyone knows how to put themselves in our shoes, and understands us from within, unless they had experienced it before.

I recently feel very disturbed over what to do, a solution to make someone important in your life happy. It’s my nature to think about others’ happiness before mine. Sometime I feel, it’s a stupid attitude, but I still practice it. Stupid right? It’s funny, how a person that you know in a short period of time, bonded with you so well. But anyway, sometimes I feel, without me in this person’s life, life would be much peaceful and happier, because I think all I have given to this friend of mine, is just frustration. I believe my friend does not deserve that from me. However, despite that, there were also happiness that I cherish so much in this friendship. I want to end this almost-every day-frustration for my friend, but my heart feels so hurtful when I think of not being close anymore. If I tell, there is a possibility that we will no longer be close, even worse, we won’t be friends. I am not ready to lose this precious friendship of mine. I wish someone could tell me what’s the right thing to do. 

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