i don’t know what to say.

it’s funny how we tend to remember the bad side of someone, more than the good side of a person. the bitter memory more than the sweet memory. i remember every single teeny tiny sweet stuff and it means a lot to me, but at the same time, i too remember every single bitter stuff. when i think of the bitter things and sharp words, all the sweet stuff goes away.

which is why i always touch on the power of words, cause’ once you said it you can’t take it back. sometimes even, it hurts so badly that it’s too late to make it right. with the feeling i have right now, i wish i could sprint as hard and as fast as i can, letting out all the anger and dilemma, or sing my heart out at the beach.

at this moment, part of me has given up. i know i’m ready to end this by walking away. because frankly, i know, i made a person who is important to me feels miserable around me. i don’t know why i do that, but i certainly did. i know it when i see the happiness and smile on that face when i am not around. as a friend, even though i know i’ll be devastated, i’m willing to just leave, so my friend would not need to deal with me and could be happy always.

positively thinking, why wouldn’t i consider trying to make things right? let’s just say, i feel this misery could only be ended with one way. this is not another emo post. this is the post where i need to express out my feeling and stuffiness that i’m feeling right now. cause it’s getting harder to breathe with it. just like the title said it, “i don’t know what to say”. i just need to say it.


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