Fragile


Many of us are afraid to love, committing into a relationship or marriage because the fear of getting their heart broken, of giving too much, of ending up with the wrong person in life over powered them. A heart break is a heart break, regardless of how many relationships we had. Each time, the light of hope and trust diminished and we came up with our very own protection mechanism.

But, how will you ever know if the person is the right one for you? Truth is, you never will. Nobody in this world will ever know a person deep down to the core but him or herself. I’ve been slammed on the face with a dramatic ugly truth of late, and I certainly do not know how I should feel about the matter and am yet to decide how to go through with it. Turned out, the person that I thought I’ve known for a long time is not exactly what I thought he/she is.

Love, relationship and marriage are not as simple as all the lyrics in a love song or as romantic as all the fairytales in a romance novel. They are as fragile as a glass. Small cracks on it might shatter it all; unexpected event that may not even seem possible when you are in that sweet little bubble of yours, regardless how long and stable a relationship or marriage is. Adulthood is complicated at times, and everything and anything is possible. That however, does not give us any room to judge because you can never put yourself in another person’s shoe until you go through the similar situation yourself.

There is no man in this world who knows what the future holds. The only thing we could take charge of, is to have hope and courage. One needs to decide whether or not he/she is worth taking the risk with, have courage and take a leap of faith to find happiness, true love, to love, to be loved and go through ups and downs together. It takes two to tango; a hard work of a lifetime to keep the glass intact regardless of the cracks; to sustain the love, passion, respect, tolerance and many other aspects in a relationship or marriage.

For a person who have only been in a failed relationship twice all my life, single, not married and the lack of years of life experiences may not put me as the best person to write and talk about this but I’ve been equally hurt like some of you out there who probably went through many more heart breaks than I did. However, with each relationship we went through, we gained memories worth telling and ponder in life be it sweet or sour, learned about ourselves better, knowing your self worth, what we want and deserve in life despite the heart ache that might be inevitable.

I’ve subconsciously allowed fear to take place in a tiny corner of my fragile little heart even though I appear to be my usual happy, confident and tough self most of the time, but gladly, I’ve also allowed time to perform it’s magic. I finally broke free from the chains that I’ve put on myself by leaving the fear, uncertainties, insecurities and expectations that I have in that tiny corner, embracing the fact that it will always be there in life and knowing that by keeping myself locked up for a long time, I will miss out all the beautiful things in life. Find your happy place because life is just too short.

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